Ghosts

Today I spoke to a person, who I wouldn't have spoken to until the day I die, if I didn't know how to be a good christian. T asked that I didn't mention his whole name. In previous blogs, I wrote about Tommy Chicago. I'm staring at my phone right now, almost in utter shock that I found the nerve to talk to him. It was like talking to a ghost. Like talking to my past that had been so far back I barely remember it. I thought I would be bitter. But I drew strength from god, and had the conversation I needed to have with him. I told him how I felt, he told me I was right.... It was foreign to me. He always said I was wrong, even when I knew I was right. He recently went through what he put me through. And I felt bad for him. I felt bad because I know what crying myself to sleep on a bathroom floor feels like. I know what it is like to lose someone to the world of drugs. I know what it is like to give your heart away to someone who refuses to take care of it. I'm not saying we are the same, by all means we are completely different. But this is a human being that I once cared the world about, and I felt bad. I didn't feel bad, I felt terrible. If you read this, know that everything happens for a reason, even if we think things are a coincidence, chances are they are not. People do bad things. That is no reason to not have a desire to change for the better. I hope you prove me wrong, Tommy Chicago. I'm not choosing sides, I'm just choosing what is right. Getting your life in order is a good start. I'm actually somewhat happy I got to talk to him. And, I hope to hear about the progress he may be making.