Who am I (more in depth)

I am the only me I am

I can say I love my life. That is the light. I survived 2 car accidents. I am Kimberlie Brooke Draper. Sunshine Wilcox was my name at birth. I'm not joking. I love to eat hamburgers and pizza. No rice cakes for me.

I love my life. To death. I have the best sister in the world. ANd no one can top that. I have met some of the craziest, different people in the whole world. And I love them for being unique.

From this moment onI will be myself. To the end because I'm happy with who I am. I'm a ballerina, a bmx rider, a soccer girl. I geek out at playing video games or petting electric eels. I can announce the alphabet backwards if you ask me too. I love animals and cry at the animal abuse commercial (EVERY TIME) I have a diary I never write in. I like taking pictures. I have lots of clothes I never wear. I just like them. I want to be beautiful always. Because I know I am. I get mad easy. I cry on occasion. I laugh at naughty jokes or racist ones but I love my ethnic friends. I dance and sing in the shower. I like crazy hairstyles but dont dare do some of them. I fantasize of gerard Butler. I still always think about how those who have hurt me are doing. I still think about those I have hurt and how they are doing.

I believe in a heavenly father. ANd a Christ. And a holy ghost. I believe that someone is watching me very closely from heaven. I think it may be from doing baptisms for the dead in the lds temple.

I love music. ANd believe that everyone at the Orem and Provo HOT TOPICs are musically brilliant cuz they know everything. I always learn something from everyone I have met. And I will carry that with me to my grave. To those who read this your great for giving me the time.

Thanks for being a part of my life

I want to change. And I need your help. I want to see the life I once had as an athlete, an avid church member, a leader in my community, a shoulder to cry on. I want to be a good girl. So dont bother me with nonsense that doesn't conform to my standards. Because I wont comply. I will not break this time. I am very strong....... in mind, soul and my physical being. Thank you for listening

On Deeper Matters

I dont know what I do to be this terrible when it comes to dating, but I take the cake. I could weed out every bad boy or "closet bad boy" this universe has to offer. The song may be true nice guys finish last...... but I dont believe a word of it. I haven't met a guy who comes to the standards of "nice" as this tune so clearly assembles. A peek into my life. I am an open book, if you have a question for me I'll answer you as truthful as possible. Some hindsight on my dating. Kims list of "d-bags" 101
1. Camden- loved him. Talked about marriage; other empty aspects of my life. We fought a lot, and it was both our fault. He would use words to negotiate situations to his liking. And leave me in a mind full of doubts and hurt. He still remains to this day one of my all time best friends. Even though sometimes I HATE him. I LOVE him too.
2. Stinky- was a waste of my time. (If you dont like my honesty, you may need to leave my blog for this post). A cheater always gets caught Bradee. It's only a matter of time. Good thing we weren't serious.
3. Devin- Filled a temporary void in my life. Getting over Camden was so hard. Immensely.  When that was full, I didn't need him anymore. He was still in love with his ex girlfriend and he didn't need me. I moved on.
4.Shawn- We make excellent friends. That is all
5. Tyler. TFF Your head is in the air and your brain is green from all that weed. But your funny. Not my type of material at all.
6. Shaun- Try a bit and you may get the girl. Just not this one.
7. Kalen- Please sort out your life. I know you have so much on your plate but please.
8.Justin- Save your words for someone who cares. He spent so much time convincing people what a great guy he is, and to feel bad for him. Now I know what to think of you. And now I know how Kourtnee truely felt, but not by hearing about it. But by witnessing it 7 feet from me.

9. I dont know who you are- treat me right, and I will treat you right. Hold my hand in public. Make me feel like I'm the only girl in the world. Be smart, and mend my heart together. Because there are pieces scattered across this life. And I dont think I can get them back. Maybe you could fix me. Fix this troublesome mindset I'm in.

UGH.... True

HA Ha HA Ha

So I think this is as crazy accurate as it gets to look decent these days. People do spend too much time trying to convince others of something that is a complete and total lie. Just be yourself. Everyone else is already taken. Goodbye lovelies and liars. Until next post adeu@!

How to trick people into thinking you're good looking

Bit of Lovely randomness.

So here I sit again, phone at my side and television blaring in the background and think....... this has become the American lifestyle. How lazy am I? Something needs to get me whipped into shape or my efforts are useless.

Just a tidbit of information here and there for this post. 1. If you are excersizing and asking for results in a week, forget about it. Ghandi didn't teach all of his knowledge in one week. Piccaso did not make a painting in a day. Things are impossible in this world if you ask so much. Time to start thinking small. Like Benjamin Franklin quoted; take care of the pennies and the dollars will take care of themselves. Food for thought.

I realized on my paper route what my favorite flower is. I sat mindlessly, listening to the Ceasars, popping handful after handful of sunflower seeds in my mouth and........ BANG!!!! It hit me. I LOVE SUNFLOWERS. More than I coud love life itself. The beauty, the tall majesty of this flower just riddles me with admiration. Oh what a specimen! I want a million of them!

I wish I could have a day of my life spent in the mountains, alone, fending for myself against the odds. Wouldn't it be nice? I think everyone needs a chance to watch into the Wild. Maybe then will you understand my reasonings. Ah well, I'm off to my lovely little dreamland. So long little liars and lovelies!

Beautiful things

SO I think that the best thing on my paper route has to be the sunrise. It's so beautiful, golden. The one moment that all you really think about is how beautiful this earth is and the world stands at attention. You cant beat that early morning sunrise. Stay golden Ponyboy.

Such Sweetness

So..... when it comes to my friends, I can guarantee I have the best. EVER. Hands down no backsies. I mean, look at this lovely drawing one of them gave me :) How cute is too cute? Definately not this. Thank you it lightened up my day oh so much!

Paper...... GIRL!!!

SO I just want to fill in whoever reads this that my job is being a paper girl. No I do not ride a bike, yes I do get attacked by dogs and on small occasions cats, and no I do not like waking up early. But A job is a job and gangstas gotta eat..... I sometimes wish I could be rich and not have to worry about money, but what would I have to worry about? Everyone has worry. SO starting August 1st I'm probably gonna be digging roots for 12 dollars an hour. Monday through Friday, 8-5. SOunds easy right? Thats where they get you. Ah for sugar coated sweetnesses.

Music for the soul

I believe there is a whole world out there just for music. I love, love, love music. And I love the kind of music that inspires, activates thought, initiates conversation, and brings on a whole new world to your mind on a silver lyrical platter.

My favorite songs are too many to say, so if I dont get a genre in this little list please dont be upset. 1. Telescope Eyes by Eisley. 2. Anything really from the Gorillaz they rock my socks. 3. Paper tigers by the Ceasars. 4. Suzie by Boy Kill Boy 5. The Same Graceful Wind by Vanna 6. The Abortion Plan By Oceana. 7. Lady Gaga's many many songs ;) we are all little monsters inside for your information. 8. Too Legit To Quit by MC Hammer. 9. Here comes goodbye by Rascal Flatts. and 10. The rest of my enormous music collection :)

Also you may have noiced the Primitives on my page. I love the style that they bring forth. Just an indie original. Also, I'm in love with Arctic Monkeys Brainstorm. Amazing haha. I love British influences.

I think my motivations for loving so many kinds of music came from working at Hot Topic in Orem Utah. I worked with so many different music lovers, and the store is All About The Music-which may be contrary to alot of peoples beliefs. But it is, I fell in love with it, and fell hardcore for the hardcore. But it changed me....... evolved me into something I should never have become and I'm glad I pulled through. See, angry music made me angry. Sad music made me sad. Songs for revenge made me vengeful, and happy music made me unbelievably happy. And I know my closest noticed my changes. Music makes you bi polar...... Just make sure you are listening to the right things at the right time or you could have a very deadly combination.

I'll tell you my history in music. I got my first, very own c.d./ cassette player when I was 8 years old. I'll tell you now, I hated listening to my moms music. My dads was great but my moms made me sick. Too slow, beats to boring, and voices that even cats cried too. Any ways, first cd player and my fisrt 2 c.d's ever were Aaron Carter and Savage Garden Affirmation. I loved them both. Then it went to Britney Spears, Backstreet Boys and Nsync. I loved pop music and I still do to this day. Then my tastes became more of the rock persuasion, Green day Three Days Grace and yada yada yada. Then hip hop. 50 Cent and Rap Eminem T.I. Bone Thugs n' Harmony, Biggie, Tupac.......... the works. Then Indie Eisley, Boy Kill Boy, Ceasars. All around good music for me and very inspirational tunes.

I'll always have a love for music. Sometimes i go back and forth from what I'm listening too, but it's all because my mind wants it that way. I hope that everyone grows an appreciation for different types of music. You never know what you will enjoy in the end.

Caesars - Paper Tigers (Video)

The Primitives Crash

Early Morning candies

I'm a firm believer in not believing a thing dietary plans have to say. It stresses the thoughts and puts empty hope in those of us who would like to be thinner, but can't because we can't afford a liposuction plan.

I woke up today feeling indifferent. That is why I have a blog now. I realize that I have an unusual way of seeing the world, and my spectrum may or may not want to be viewed by the world. We shall see shan't we?

But anyways, I woke up and decided to eat candy. And eggs. A bit of an unusual breakfast but it is sitting in my stomache very well. As are the bags and bags of sunflower seeds. I feel I may have some bird in me.....

I realize that my blog is practically sporadic.... and I apologize. I have so many thoughts that I cant contain them. And I lose them. Sometimes they come back to me, but in a few weeks, months, even years down the road. So bear with me.

But anyways, this is about food. And Yesterday I thought about food. Not to eat food but about food as in a concept kind of way. Most of peoples gatherings (get togethers) are based around food. Meetings involve a quick pizza. Friend rant sessions and venting relieves are done over a burger or salad. Church activities even Lady Gaga exuberants all shared millions of pieces of pizza in Times Square. I also realize that our nation is the largest...... in weight. Now I wonder, if we didn't focus our lives around eating, would we be more slim? I don't have much room to talk though I feel. I am normal weight, but I could lose some extra of what I have. But to those I see who struggle..... I wish I could find a cure. Maybe instead of sitting and eating, sitting and doing a craft is far better. Who would know?

I feel I have struggled with weight all my life though. Some of you may roll your eyes at me and think that 130 pound twig is just ranting. But I have. I've always seen the more popular girls in school not eat. Or if they do they eat so much less. They weigh about 105-115 and I wonder why I cant have that. They had their perfect bodies, and I was stuck in this blob. ( Not a fat blob) I've never been fat or overweight. But I think my mind weighs me down enough that it could get confused so easily. I hate it. Back and forth and back and forth people say your beautiful. No I'm not I'm just mediocre why cant you see that or say it to my face? Would it make me feel better? I think it could.

Ive started this new trend of walking on the treadmill or the elliptical. Instead of just sulking about my not fat body, I'll make it a "no fat body". No excuses KBOB will be athletic enough to be a boflex woman ( not really) But I will be shaped into what I think is beautiful. And I encourage you all to do the same. Starting............ Now